Streaking the Broadmoor
There's a "5-star, world class hotel" here in Colorado Springs. It lives up to every expectation of what a five star hotel should be - everybody is dressed up nice, their bars and clubs are very overpriced and very snooty, and it's absolutely gorgeous. I have found myself there once in a while, either for a conference or for hanging out with friends who enjoy that crowd. Last night was one of the instances of the latter.
Several of my friends are at the Broadmoor fire pit, hanging out, drinking martini's, and pretty much doing the whole Broadmoor thing. Also, they are in "costume". They invite me, and I say, "I am in a very random, very non-Broadmoor appropraite costume - do you think that's okay?" My friend responds, "yeah, you'll be fine. I'm dressed up as a bee."
So I walk into the broadmoor. Barefoot. Wearing a trenchcoat - only - and head out back to the fire pit. I did have on a tiny pair of running shorts, however nobody could see them. I was a streaker for halloween. It was quite a fun, random costume. Just before I get through the Broadmoor, I walk past a group of four people, and the older lady stops mid sentence, gasps, and says "Oh... My... God..." They all turn and look at me like I was a stray dog wandering through their prestigious hotel. I just laugh to myself.
Anyways, my friends were *not* in costume (except the bee), and nobody else there was in costume. I felt a little out of place. But it made for quite a good story and random event. Hope you enjoyed.
A story about James
Monday night I heard a really cool story about faith in the most unlikely of places. This story spoke directly to my heart because it took place on Skid Row in downtown Los Angeles, very close to where I went to school and where the focus of my mother's ministry lies. Skid row has always been a place that I have been challenged and broken. Several friends and I during college would go there with a few pizzas and open hearts, and simply sit down with the homeless and hang out. I can remember listening to a woman's story and hearing her hopes of how to get out of the situation. She was there through no major fault of her own - she was a good person dealt a bad hand in life. As I was listening to her, beyond her face within a mile I could see the Los Angeles skyline, the large buildings and skyscrapers standing in the background. Here was this woman, short on money and luck, living in a box beneath the symbols of wealth and commerce on the west coast. She told me with great passion and excitement how she had planned to get off skid row. First she would get a job and start saving, then she would buy a car so she could live in that and get off the streets and get cleaned up, save more money, etc., etc. She can't get a job until she gets cleaned up, and can't keep the job unless she's cleaned up. Its a vicious cycle. Heartbreaking.
So Spokes tells me this story of this missions trip to Skid Row (spokes is native Coloradan). On the trip they did a bunch of different things with a bunch of different ministries all over town. On his first day out, they had $9 to get breakfast for himself, 2 partners, and one homeless person. They opted for the 99 cent menu at McDonald's. Good choice college students! The man they met was James, and he was genuinely grateful for breakfast. Here's the best part - in the middle of eating James says, you know how good God is? He always provides for me exactly what I need.
Woah! Dude's homeless! I get ticked off when I get tomatoes on my hamburger. Homebody ain't got no home and he's stoked on God's provision. Wow.
So, as the week carried on and Spokes moved from ministry to ministry, he kept seeing James in different places. On the street here, in a soup kitchen there, often local to where he met James, but sometimes a good ten miles away. And James was always smiling. Always content. Content. A man who had nothing understood being content. He understood his true source of joy and provision. Thats a role model that I want to have.
Being Authentic Without Being Annoying
Last Sunday I was discussing the movie "Saved!" with my students and we got onto the topic of being real. I was talking about how it is common in conversation for one person to say, "How are you?" and the other person to respond, "Fine." or "Good." Very rarely do you hear somebody say something along the lines of "not good", even though our lives are filled with amazing events, both good and bad.
This spurred an interesting thread. First, it's a generally accepted way to begin a conversation in a non-threatening manner. And it is also generally accepted knowledge that the individual asking the question really does not care to
know
how you are. So why do we ask the question in the first place? Why do we even waste our time and breath? How might our communities and relationships be different if we actually were authentic in our conversations?
Secondly, when we are asked the same question we more often than not respond with the same non-threatening "fine". We do this for a number of reasons - we don't know them well enough and really don't feel like getting into anything beyond surface level, we don't think that they are interested in hearing about us, or in the event of struggles we don't want to appear weak. We like to wear the face that says, "everything is fine."
I challenged the students to be real in their relationships. When somebody that you are close to asks you, "How's it going?" to tell them. When you ask somebody how they are, be ready and
willing
to listen. At this point one of my students brought up an interesting point. He said, "But when you ask somebody how they are doing nobody wants to hear some sob story." I can see where he is going with the point. You know the people that are always looking to be the victim and simply love to gripe and complain? Yeah - I don't want to hear their sob story either. So how do we live authentic and real relationships while avoiding the dreaded "sob stories"?
In my opinion several things need to change. First, we need to start answering the questions asked of us. If somebody asks how you are, tell them. They will let you know how interested they are in knowing more. Also, this will begin the developing of a deeper relationship. If you ask somebody how they are, be interested. Ask follow up questions. If they say, "okay", say something like, "Good ok, or bad ok?" Be slow to speak and quick to listen. But most importantly, lets be real. I think we will be amazed to learn about the stories that others in our lives are living.
Sweet!
Coolest thing happened this week. I have been trying to figure out how to get out to the
Youth Specialties conference next month in Atlanta, GA. These conferences are incredible - an entire semester's seminary course on youth ministry is packed into five days. In addition, you are surrounded by five thousand other youth ministers that all remind you through your actions that you are in fact not weird, but youth ministers in general are a different breed of people. And lastly, there is a ton of bands (Caedmon's Call, Jars of Clay, and Bebo Norman this year to name a few) which plain rock. In my limited experiences the youth specialties conference has been one of the greatest catalysts to my ministry.
Attending these conferences in Cali was a piece of cake. For one, I worked at a large church with many volunteers and a large budget - and a tradition of attending. Secondly, one of the three national conferences is ALWAYS in Cali - alternating between north and south every year. However, I am now at a small church - with one volunteer - one tenth the budget - no tradition of going - and no close conference. The biggest budget I could muster up was $250 - and the cost of registration for an individual is $350. And thus a dilemma is faced. I don't have much of an income, and forking up another $500 of personal bling bling would be VERY difficult (impossible?) to swing. So I started beating the bushes - looking for connecions, networking, seeking any kind of help possible. Peak 3 is going out - I tried to hitch a ride, but they're leaving too early. I finally found somewhat of a lead from a church in town. They're going out with several of their church staff, and they found me an extra spot in the hotel room. Sweet!
But check this out - I asked if I could register with them - dropping the registration cost from $350 to $265. I mentioned my tight budget and how it would be helpful. Know how they responded? They responded with my registration confirmation! They paid for my registration - without even being asked. WOW. What an incredible example of BEING the church - supporting a ministry that they have no direct involvement in such a practical way.
How cool would it be if we could shift this paradigm to our daily lives? Jesus always took care of the needs of the individual - whether physical, emotional, or spiritual. He always did so unconditionally. He never said, "Well, I'll heal your sight, but only if you devote your life to me." He looked beyond the sin and shortcomings of the individual to see the person themselves - and He loved them exactly where they had need. He often told those that He healed to keep it a secret. Sometimes the people were so grateful that they were incapable of keeping the secret - they had to tell about how stoked they were about what Jesus had done for them. Other times they said, thanks, see ya later. But that didn't matter - Jesus saw their need and took care of it.
See you in Atlanta!
Return to Peak 3
I had a very unique opportunity/experience this weekend. I went to Peak 3 not as staff, not as volunteer, but as a TL - Trip Leader. As a Peak 3 client. As a camper. Two worlds collided as my season in Colorado has come full circle. Instead of being a leader in the vision that brought me here to Colorado I was a consumer of that vision - and it was incredible.
I brought eight students and two leaders with me to Peak 3 Friday night for a simple overnighter trip. I experienced the service - Levi (my roommate) was at camp before we were there - he was building a fire for us and had lanterns and blankets for the students. He helped get the cabin's set up. When we showed up at the ropes course at 9am, I saw 5 of the staff there with the gear set up. I saw them interact with the students in a loving and professional manner. The fact that I am a close friend and former staff meant nothing to how they loved on the students. I experienced the team - I saw my students challenged in ways that they had never been challenged before. I saw a father and a son cross a tight wire relying solely on each other for support. I saw a woman with a prosthetic hip complete an entire ropes course when she didn't even think she would get off the ground. I saw two students who had little to no church experience (but many piercings) actually enjoy a church event and desire to come back for more. I experienced the trust, when it was I who crossed the tight wire with nothing to rely on except the student that was supporting my weight, and I his. And I experienced the truth - the truths of God that are revealed through adventure and wilderness. The clarity of the voice of God in the stillness and silence of wilderness. And I experienced fellowship with the students. The relationships that are built through camping. Everything from spontaneous worship songs to late night campfire discussions about farts. The opportunity to speak into a student's life through the building of relationships.
I was impressed with Peak 3's willingness to run a trip for a small group in the off season. I hope that the students were as impacted as I was... and I hope that the truths they learned and the change they experienced lasts back here to the Springs and doesn't stay at 9500 feet.
Saved... and so completely wrong
Saved... a new independent film with Mandy Moore and others - is a story about several high school students at a Christian High School. It is a perfect Christian Utopia. All the Chriatianese is used, and all sense of reality is lost. It exaggerates the ways that those immersed in a Christian community live. Then, two weeks before their senior year starts, everything goes wrong.
Mary (main character in the film) is told by her boyfriend that he thinks that he is gay. She then sees a vision in which Jesus tells her "He needs you very much right now". She attempts to "de-gay" him and ends up sleeping with him, and gets pregnant.
The story goes to show how they are both ostracized from the Christian community. You really have to see the movie to get how bad it is. And the worst part of it all, even though the movie exaggerates many points, it is not too far from the truth. Think about the things that happen to good people in life. Yet in the Christian community the visible sin is turned into an abomination. You can't be an alcoholic, a drug addict, pregnant, somebody who cusses, smokes... you get the idea. We all put on this show of being these perfect people, when that is completely opposite of how we are called to live. We are called to be humble, the lowest, servants. Yet we live as if our poo don't stink. Why? Why can't we live as the broken people we are? Why can't we love people as the broken people they are? Why can't we love like Jesus did - looking beyond the sin (visible or invisible) and loving the individual despite their weaknesses and struggles? How much more amazing would this world be if we loved people in that way?
Lets start living so unselfishly that we are able to see past the temptation to make ourselves feel better when another falls that we humble ourselves to where they are at - and love them as who they are - a child of God.
Teaser...
So, it's late, but I can't help myself - I am coming off an amazing two days at Peak 3 with my students, and tonight I watched a very insightful movie - "Saved" with Mandy Moore - a very introspective look into the christian community/bubble. Stay tuned for the next two posts - they will be good ones.
Webbed Feet
I learned something yesterday. Not just one of those normal lessons, but a lesson about somebody that I care dearly about. Somebody that I live with. Somebody that often shares a bed with me.
He has webbed feet.
He's been with me almost every day since October 2003, and before him, I had one just like him for five months. And all this time I never knew that Labrador Retrievers have webbed feet.
(This is the part of the blog where you laugh and shake your head)
I did a little research into this topic - just to see how *coughcoughstupidcough* ignorant I really was. Well, I went to several websites about labs, and they all specifically mentioned their webbed feet and how it makes them such good swimmers. Now, if a dog can keep a secret like this, how much more can the people in our lives? That's one of those things both exciting and frightening at the same time. Exciting because of the diversity that comes with the human spirit - God did not create us to be dull, boring, or simple creatures! However we can also hide from those we love all too easily.
Defining Moments
Today I was speaking with the senior pastor at the church I work at about the defining moments in out lives. Think of the times when you made a decision, either to do or not to do something, and how that decision has paved the road to where you are at right now.
For example, I have often reflected on my decision to attend USC. I went there with the intention of obtaining my Bachelors of Architecture from one of the best architecture schools in the nation. I wanted to design buildings and be rich and famous. However, within a semester, I felt the Lord urging my heart to pursue His calling - working with youth. I switched my major to Education and eventually to Psychology. And I didn't even finish. I heeded the advice of pretty much everybody; stick it out at USC (even though I was paying for it all myself), the cost is not a factor, it will all come back to you eventually. Frankly, a degree at USC doesn't really matter in pursuing the ministry. My qualifications come (or should) purely from the Lord. I have often regretted attending USC, primarily for the large debt that I now have to various financial instutions.
However, if I had not attended USC, I would not be here right now. I may or may not have been in the ministry. I would not have been involved with the founding of USC's only Christian fraternity, and thus I would not be involved in Boulder right now. I would not have gotten involved at Bel Air Pres, and thus I would have never been trained as a river guide. That training brought me into the outdoor industry and that industry brought me to Colorado. What would have happened? Well, I can only speculate and wonder.
Anyways, this conversation came up while talking about the air force. In my senior year of high school I was offered a ROTC scholarship with the option of flight training. Kinda tripped me out... I knew they had my ASVAB scores, but they found a bunch of other test scores including medical records with my vision scores on them. Anyways - I was very much tempted. It had been a boyhood dream of mine to fly - everything from loving planes to my favorite boyish movie "Iron Eagle". However, even admist the turmoil of dealing with my father's suicide, I decided that I did not want to commit 12 years of my life to something at the age of 17. I get a headache wondering where I would be now and what I would be doing and what my character would look like if I had made that decision six years ago.
The list is endless on moments like these. What if I had driven a different route? What if I had stayed home? What if I went there instead of here?
The only thing that calms these wonderments in my mind is the knowledge that I am in God's hand. "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord. "Plans to help you, not to harm you. Plans to give you hope and a future." We must remember that we are in God's hands. We cannot even begin to understand or fathom where our lives will take us. Let us act with wisdom and discernemnt in those moments - and thus in all moments - because we often do not even know when those life altering moments are upon us - or how far those ripples in the pond will spread.
Fraternity and Christian Life
I had quite an amazing/fascinating/intense day today for many reasons... However tonight I will only get into one of them -
I am a founding father of a fraternity at USC. Before visions of Animal House flash through your mind, it is a chapter of a national Christian fraternity, and there is a chapter here in colorado - at CU Boulder. I recently have been getting involved with the chapter in Boulder in the role of chapter advisor. Tonight was my first night. If you have been keeping up with the news, you know that a pledge of a fraternity died about two weeks ago from alcohol poisoning. Check out these articles.
http://www.coloradodaily.com/articles/2004/09/29/news/news01.txt
http://www.coloradodaily.com/articles/2004/10/11/news/news01.txt
So, for my first appointment, I accompanied the current active chapter advisor to a meeting with Vice Chancellor Ron Stump and all the other fraternity chapter advisors. The agenda of this meeting on hand is to discuss with the leadership of the fraternities how to solve the problem on hand of "over-consumption of alcohol". The university has proposed "deferred rush" as a helpful means to reach a solution. Deferred rush means that students could not pursue fraternity membership until their 2nd or 3rd semester in college, depending on what the university would decide.
It would end the existence of many fraternities, including the one which I represent.
Which is dry.
And the university seems to not care.
After two hours of discussion, Stump said that basically nothing he had heard had even impressed him and he was convinced that deferred rush was the answer. Even though every fraternity president, chapter advisor, and national leadership council at CU is strongly opposed to the idea, and even though deferring rush does nothing to tackle a cultural issue at the root of a drinking issue within a college community.
What an interesting conundrum. The fraternity I represent is dry. It is "doing" things the way the university would like to see. However we are a member of IFC (Inter-Fraternity Council), and subject to the same hammer being dropped. A deferred rush will hurt the Greek community and not solve a single issue. Fraternities will be backed against a wall and be worrying about chapter survival rather than alcohol education. There was talk this evening about dissolving relations with the university as an entire Greek system.
What is our role in this process? How do I as a leader of a Christian fraternity act with widsom and discernment in this situation? What kind of voice needs to be heard? How in the heck do I be used as influence in this overwhelming setting, and how do I even try to influence the correct decision? The core issue is a matter of character. Sure - if the Greek system all accepts Christ, you will see a steep decline in binge drinking. But we cannot legislate morality. And we also cannot legislate alcohol (ie The Prohibition). Change will only come from a shift in culture, and a shift in culture will only come from a change in values.
So again, what is my role?
Reflections on tragedy
The righteous man perishes, and no one lays it to heart; devout men are taken away, while no one understands. For the righteous man is taken away from calamity, he enters into peace; they rest in their beds who walk in their uprightness. - Isaiah 58:1-2
Many of you know the struggles that I have been through in the past ten years or so with death. It is an issue that plagues us all without solid answers most of the time.
At 14, my catcher was shot in a drive-by. He was standing next to the target, a friend of his since kindergarten. At 17, my father committed suicide. On my 19th birthday a counselor at the camp I used to work at drowned with no explanation. At 20, one of my good friends was paralyzed from 4th T down (about mid chest level) in a car accident. This past March a friend of mine was killed in an avalanche. He was trained in wilderness techniques and was an experienced guide. He did nothing wrong. This past August a friend of mine was killed in a climbing accident at Garden of the Gods. He also did nothing wrong - the rock failed.
In tragedy it cannot be understood why they were taken. Why they had to die before their "time". But who are we to know when or what their time is? Who are we to know when our time is? We believe that our God is all knowing, all powerful, and loving. And thus lies our dilemma. A loving God takes someone from the world, and we are hurt. We are angry at God.
The first and second verses in Isaiah 58 speak directly on this topic. We do not understand; we do not have answers. But it says plainly that God takes them to save them from calamity. Wow. We have a hope in something greater than our short time here on earth. In the perspective of eternity, our lives are as significant as a "vapor which appears for a moment then vanishes" (James 4:14). Thus, if our short time will be plagued with calamity, then God takes us. Hmmm...
How then should we live? I believe that we are only guaranteed two things in life - one, the faithfulness of God and his love for us - two, this present moment. Not tomorrow, not next week, not next minute - but right now. If we are pursuing God's will for our lives, then where we are this moment, what we are doing in this present moment is where God desires us to be. We must strive to live every moment as if it were our last, and we must live every moment as if God has ordained this moment for us (and he has!). How much more important will the relationships in our lives become? How much more special will the time we are blessed with become?
He said I was in my early forties
with a lot of life before me
when a moment came that stopped me on a dime
and I spent most of the next days
looking at the x-rays
Talking bout the options
and talking bout sweet time
I asked him when it sank in
that this might really be the real end
how's it hit you when you get that kinda news
man what'd you do
and he said
I went sky diving
I went Rocky Mountain climbing
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named fumanchu
and I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter
and I gave forgiveness I'd been denying
and he said someday I hope you get the chance
to live like you were dying.
He said I was finally the husband
that most the time I wasn't
and I became a friend a friend would like to have
and all the sudden going fishin
wasn't such an imposition
and I went three times that year I lost my dad
well I finally read the good book and I
took a good long hard look
at what I'd do if I could do it all again
and he said
I went sky diving
I went Rocky Mountain climbing
I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named fumanchu
and I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter
and I gave forgiveness I'd been denying
and he said someday I hope you get the chance
to live like you were dying.
Like tomorrow was a gift and you got eternity to think about
what'd you do with it what did you do with it
what did I do with it
what would I do with it?
Defining Value
Last week a man was sued over a baseball. One single baseball used in a professional game with the same 108 stitches as the 89 other balls used during every Major League Baseball game. The cost of each ball is about $3.
However, this baseball is special. Not because of anything it had done, not because of any physical significance. It is significant because of what somebody has done to it. Barry Bonds hit this ball over the fence for his 700th home run - a milestone, leaving him 14 shy (at that point) of the legendary Babe Ruth. Experts estimate that the ball will be sold for about $100,000. Barry's record setting 73rd home run ball in 2001 sold for $900,000, and Mark McGwire's 70th home run in 1999 garnered 3.2 million.
So what defines worth? Ultimately it is defined by what somebody is willing to pay.
Our lives are worth one Jesus Christ. That is the price that God was willing to pay for us. He did not pay that price because of anything we had done. Our worth was not defined by what we had done well - but because of what God had done to us - creating us and loving us.
How do you define your worth? Is it based on general opinion? The opinion of a specific individual? Cultural values? Physical beauty? Money? The only true way to define worth is to be bought - and each one of us has been bought at the greatest price one could pay.
Welcome to my mind...
Hello everybody... welcome. It is my desire that after spending time here you would leave challenged, touched, changed, or otherwise impacted by the meditations of my heart. Here you will find my ramblings on various deep and not so deep thoughts, joys and pain, and the struggles and sweetness of life. Comment. Think. Pray. Cry. Smile. There are no rules.
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