Search and Rescue on the Lake, Part Two
Is it bad breaking down next to a shipwreck? Two nights ago I was peeing in my front yard (it's closer to my recliner than the bathroom. Yes, I know that I am lazy) and I noticed that something was missing off the back of my boat. The boat. The tooner. The Piece of Ship. We recently installed a new 13 gallon gas tank to work in tandem with our old 6 gallon tank, and it was gone. What in the world? Who steals gas tanks off of boats? What's worse is that the fuel line is a quick disconnect. You can take it off of the gas tank with two fingers, and a five year old could figure it out within 60 seconds without any instructions. They decided to cut the line instead.I had no idea how much this would impact my life within 24 hours.
Fuller, Angie, Danny, Gil (new roomie), and myself headed out onto the lake with plenty of beer, snacks, and 4.5 gallons of gas instead of the 14.5 gallons of gas that we had 12 hours before. Plenty of gas to make it to Sandy Beach, our destination.
We then decided to proceed to Swiss Cove, farther from harbor, but we were just fine on everything. It was just around the corner. By the time we left Sandy the wind had kicked up and we had some good 2-3 foot swells rolling across the lake.
When we arrived at Swiss Cove we did some exploring, and then things started getting fun. While exploring the beach, which was very small in a steep canyon, Fuller, Angie, Xena, and I walked past a rattlesnake. Then, we all walked back past the rattlesnake. Angie, the second to last one out, said, "Oh my God! A snake!" It was tight quarters and the snake was about a foot from her leg. I identified the snake as a Western Diamondback and we both quickly walked forward. The snake did not experience life much longer, and the beach was named "Rattlesnake Beach."
Shortly thereafter we left, and decided to head deeper into the narrows to check out the scenery.
That was about the time we realized that we were dangerously low on gas.
Priority number one was to get back to cell phone coverage. Then we had to get gas.
We made it well into cell coverage, well into the cove where the harbor is, but just not all the way. By this time the sun was all the way down and there was little light left, and suddenly nobody wanted to happen to be going to or from harbor. We were stranded. But we still had beer!
I called Lake Mead dispach and they said that they would have a boat to us within two hours. Good news. Bad news was the wind was blowing us toward shore rapidly and the waves were getting bigger.
We ran aground right on the rocky point of a peninsula. No good. I tied a rope to the boat and started walking it around the point trying to find a better mooring point. Here's what we came up with:
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Yes. We ended up at our final resting place right next to an old shipwreck.
So, we wait for another 90 minutes and finally I see a boat coming around the point. I flag the boat down with my flashlight and some morse code, and the boat happens to be the park ranger boat. Long story short, they would not give us gas or a tow, but only a ride back to the dock. I'm like, "C'mon! We need like a third of a gallon of gas!" They wouldn't have it. So, we put on some lifejackets, I go into former guide/search and rescue mode, make sure everybody is off the boat safely. I give the ranger boat a quick shove and step across to the starboard bow of the rescue boat.
Somewhere in my drunken calculations of how much umph I needed to give off my rear leg to bridge the gap to my front leg I forgot to carry a digit or a decimal point or something. This failure was further compounded by the fact that I had also pushed the boat further away with my lead leg.
Shit.
I end up going feet over ass over head straight into the drink, and nobody but Fuller noticed. The SAR guys weren't worried about me. I was the Search and Rescue guy myself complete with a rescue harness complete with knife, whistle, and quick-release retaining belt on. All that comes out of ricks mouth, in a complete normal tone of voice while standing next to one of the rangers is, "Uhh... man overboard?." I did it all without a sound other than "Sploooosh!" I popped back up, pulled myself back in the boat, and prepared myself for the laughter that was going to be directed at me.
Oh yeah. My cell phone, wallet, and car keys were in the pocket of my boardies. Cell phone still doesn't work as of this moment. LOL.
Today I hitched a ride with a Cuban dude on this boat as he was leaving harbor to my Piece of Ship. Gas and oil in the tank, get engine running, shove off rocks, back to harbor. All good.
Peace and good luck,
Devo
posted by Devo @ 5:26 PM
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